Who is this fucking guy?

Dumbass!

Gold Digger

A friend of mine sent me a link to an article in an advice column on the website boston.com. Now, I usually don't get angry at anything that's written on the internet. I know 99.5% of the shit on this glorious thing we call the interwebs is made up bullshit, and getting mad at it is kind of like getting mad at the people that make The Big Bang Theory. You know that no matter what you say, they're going to still be shitting in their pants tomorrow, so it's not worth wasting your breath. With this article though.. I have to say something.

If you read the posting at all, you learn that a man that calls himself Tired of Paying All The Time, is dating a girl that he goes out with about three to four times a week, and as you probably guessed by the moniker, he pays for all the dates. This does not bother me in the least. Everyone fucking knows that there are gold diggers out there, and they have a very specific purpose to fill in this society of ours. They are there for all those guys that have money, but are too ugly to get a real girlfriend, and too moral to get a hooker or mail order bride like a normal person. Most guys have learned to identify gold diggers from 20 paces, and learned to either stay away from, or accept them for what they are. It's not a big mystery of life.

Was he actually born yesterday?

No, the thing that really bothers me about this article is this guy. In the article he says, "I've dated a lot, the training wheels were off quite a while ago, but I've never really experienced this issue.". Are you fucking serious? So just because you've never experienced a gold digger, you can't identify one? I'm sure you've never experience a plane crash either, but the next time your plane is falling out of the sky with it's fucking wings ripped off, I'm sure you're not going to turn to the man next to you and ask, "Is this some new high tech landing technique? Have we arrived already?"

Second, it is absolutely crystal clear to me that this man did not preform the door test on this, what I would have to assume is a major fine piece of ass. Again, in the article, he mentions that he is 30 years old. 30 years on this earth is plenty of time for a man to watch the required study material on how to be a man. Even most women have watched a few of them in that given time. Movies like The Godfather, Apocalypse Now, and A Bronx Tale are fundamental guides for self development. Now, if he has never watched A Bronx Tale, than he deserves everything he gets. But since I can safely assume his did because he has a penis, he should have seen the scene that describes the door test, and a fucking light bulb should have gone off in his head and he should have said to himself, 'I will never date another woman again without first preforming the door test'. But it is clear he did not do this. And we have to ask ourselves, why?

Third, and probably the most important, if this man ever dumps her, ( and please for the love of God, and the rest of your fellow men, jump on this grenade for us ) he has now RUINED her for the rest of the men on this planet. Again I go back to the article where he states, "I enjoy going to the nicer places in Boston so each date runs around $150-$250 with drinks, cabs, etc. Multiply that by 3 or 4 and you get the weekly expenditures.". To which I reply, "Are You Fucking Kidding Me?!". A woman might get an extra value meal out of me, and if she fucking super sizes it.. blow job time. That's all I can say. Now, and for the rest of her life, this bitch is going to expect every guy to treat her like this. It's like you let the dog shit in the house for 6 months straight, and you're asking someone if it's OK to start to house train it now! You know what it's going to take to get this bitch back on track now?! At least a black man with a much bigger dick than mine and one albino midget with a whip. And that's just for starters! She is absolutely fucking ruined, and you did it!

There's a saying that goes, 'It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.'. Let us use this man as a warning for other men.

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