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Bang Bros 18 - Dillion Harper

Bang Bros 18 - Dillion Harper
Either porn stars are getting young, or I'm getting very old. And I'm not really talking about the girl this time. The guy in this scene, I have no idea what his name is, but it looks like he's at that age that his mom had to sign his permission slip to make this porn video. It's kind of weird watching a teen boy have sex, and I don't think I'm into it. Maybe there's some faction of older ladies out there that like watching teen boy porn, but I don't fall into that category, so I guess this one isn't for me.

Mike's Apartment - Katerina and Szilvia Lauren

Mike's Apartment - Katerina and Szilvia Lauren
We're once again taking a trip overseas to the fabled Mike's Apartment. The apartment that I think started somewhere in Brazil, but moves around more than Dr. Who's phone booth, and is now somewhere in Europe I think. I tend to think of it more as an honorary title now, more than anything. Mike's Apartment is just another way of saying fuck pad, but in porn term's, it has a bit of a different meaning. It's for all the foreign porn that people don't know where it came from. The answer to the eternal question, Where the fuck did they film this? is always going to be Mike's Apartment.

Alexa Grace and Ana Foxxx in VR

Alexa Grace and Ana Foxxx in VR
This one is for all you guys out there that live in constant fear that your wife is coming home while you have the VR headset on. VR takes jerking off to a sport level. Let's see how long you can keep the headset on with someone else in the house. I think the world record is a little over three minutes with the door unlocked. But, if you're one of those guys that are willing and able to keep the head set on without giving a fuck, there is a pretty great scene over on Naughty America right now.

My Dirty Maid - Sophia Leone

My Dirty Maid - Sophia Leone
The worst job in America use to be Assistant Crack Whore, but I think it's been recently replaced by White House Press Secretary. It's a job really gets no thanks. Everyone makes fun of you. Women dress up like you on TV. All you can do is hope not to screw up. And you know whatever you say today, your boss is going to say something different tomorrow. So, I don't know if Sean is going to be eligible for unemployment, seeing as how he only worked for six months, and then quit. So he's going to have to find another job quickly. Hopefully it's not going to be Assistant Crack Whore. There are better jobs out there though..

Housewife 1 on 1 - Alison Tyler and Jada Stevens

Housewife 1 on 1 - Alison Tyler and Jada Stevens
Let me give you an small example of a simple way the porn industry can make every scene a little bit better. Let's take for instance, this scene from Housewife 1 on 1. Normally this site has great POV scenes with a very lovely woman, it's usually great, and people love them. But every once in a while, they choose to make the scene a lot better by doing something very simple. Adding one more woman. And really, one extra nude woman for any situation always makes things a little better. So my simple suggestion is, whenever you're making a scene, ask yourself, 'how many women do I need?'. And whatever your answer is, add one more naked woman.

Madison Ivy's Return!

Madison Ivy's Return!
Alright all you Brazzers fans out there. It's time to start thinking up excuses to separate yourselves from the rest of the world on Sunday. No, it's not football starting early.. it's actually something a little more exciting. ( well, maybe less if you're not a fan of her's ) The long awaited return of Madison Ivy is finally upon us, and we all finally have something to jerk off to when we're thinking about the first lady. By the way, do you think she still lets the Prez hit that every once in a while? It had to have been one time after election night, and nothing since then. I bet he gets a once a year pass for his birthday or something.

Moms Bang Teens - Holly Hendrix and Isis Love

Moms Bang Teens - Holly Hendrix and Isis Love
So, after watching youtube videos on how to put on a strapless bra for a few hours, I've decided to check out some actual porn instead. I need to pick something quick, because after staring at tits for that long, I needed to actually stop staring at tits for a while and do something productive. I just needed to finish staring first. After seeing so many different ones, I've decided to not actually decide and pick a small pair and a big pair at the same time. With so many teen/milf sites, it's pretty easy to find that combination in the same video. Especially on Moms Bang Teens.

Pure 18 - Lara Brookes

Pure 18 - Lara Brookes
Today we're checking out the very young and very lovely Lara Brookes. Wait you say.. I heard she wasn't that young, right? Well, you may be right. But my point is, I can easily pretend that she's 18, and that's all I really need, right? Watching her porn is like watching a high school play. Instead of actors, you get a few teens pretending to be actors. With Lara, it's like you're watching a teen pretending to be a porn star. And that's almost better than the real thing.

Asian 1 on 1 - Cindy Starfall

Asian 1 on 1 - Cindy Starfall
Just once.. just as a surprise, I would like to go to Asian 1 on 1 and see a little Chinese guy and a huge blonde girl banging it out. The don't have to do it often, but I think it would be kind of funny to do it once. Asian porn is definitely different though. You know how most Western porn tries to find the guy with the biggest dick to fuck every girl in town. Well Asian ( especially Japanese ) seems to take the opposite direction when it comes to dick size. And it leaves me thinking, are the majority of guys that small, or are they trying to find the guys with the smallest dicks to make everyone else in the country feel good about themselves?

Monster Curves - Jada Stevens

Monster Curves - Jada Stevens
Can you really call perfect curves 'Monster Curves'? I don't think so. And that's really what Jada Stevens is all about. There's not a part of her ass that I would change in any way. Now, someone else might think a little different about it, but of course, they would be wrong, and they should burn in a layer of hell reserved for people like the guy who invented New Coke, and Hitler.

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